40 of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week (May 24, 2025)

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
May 24, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

We all need a little tweet to lift our moods every now and again. Life gets so boring that we need stuff that makes it interesting. We need jokes to keep us alive. If we didn't have jokes… if we didn't have ways to react to all the crazy stuff in the news, we would have nothing. We need ways to make little goofs and gags out of whatever crazy is going on in the world at large. 

And there is never a lack of crazy stuff going on in our world. Sure, it's a little dumb. The internet is famously a little dumb. We don't always come on here as our best, truest selves. We sometimes come bringing our basest instincts and our worst takes. But that's okay. We need a place to be a little bit stupid. As long as we aren't punching down to anyone else. 

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  • These tweets are perfect examples of tweets that do just that. They're little jokes and distractions from our real world. They're funny comments on our world at large. They're perfectly stupid and perfectly dumb. They have something to say, but even more to not say. So if that sounds like something you want… they're right below for you. 

  • 01
    arianators wildin @arianatorswildt when does her visa expire Pop Base - @PopBase 19h 'Emily In Paris' Season 5 is now in production at Netflix. ブロ C 11:07 AM 5/7/25.5.4M Views • 366 18K Sessa 229K ☐ 2.1K
    via @arianatorswildt
  • 02
    Keara Sullivan @superkeara Your password must contain two characters who talk to each other about something other than a man 10:33 PM 5/12/25 1.2M Views → 75 tz 7.1K 86K 2K 企
    via @superkeara
  • 03
    7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000 She told him they can get McDonald's on the way home CONFERENCE PLAYOFFS EASTERN CON NEW YOR KNICK 2024 TIMOTHÉE CHALAMET 10:15 AM 5/13/25 124K Views 14 115 KYLIE JENNER 3.5K 85 ↑
    via @DaveMcNamee3000
  • 04
    Allie @Cluffalo I'm not usually the type to get jealous over other people's weddings But I saw a girl on reels say she incentivized people to RSVP by making the order in which people RSVP their order to get up and get dinner and I am being driven to insanity by how genius that is 11:12 AM 5/8/25 234K Views 57 314 11K ☐ 791
    via @Cluffalo
  • 05
    Transfer Portal @NCAAPortal I'm not familiar with “leftover bacon" Nick Ford @Ford_Nick. 1d What do you do with leftover bacon... 1:38 PM 5/11/25 3.8M Views
    via @NCAAPortal
  • 06
    gurg* @gurgx3 the entire population is getting dumber and dumber around me and there nothing I can do but watch LIVE 3:321 5G 80 STEM Explore Following Shop For You Q What's crazy to me is how literally the whole world put USB ports everywhere and invested so much $ in putting them everywhere and then Apple was just like nahhh we gonna do USB-C now 125.3K 1,279 992 Dani Like why does it feel illegal¿ #usb #usbc #ports #chargers ♫ original sound - its_jonel04 Fasten se 810
    via @gurgx3
  • 07
    Outa @CallMeOuta I used to have this mental illness where I thought logical arguments would change someone's mind 5:18 PM 5/8/25 2.3M Views 1.2K • 21K 110K ☐ 7.9K ↑
    via @CallMeOuta
  • 08
    Smokin Jay Cutler @sniffmytable Shaking my girlfriend's dad's hand "Great grip sir I see where she gets it from" • 10:28 AM 5/16/24 6M Views • 188 27 10K 111K ☐ 7.4K
    via @sniffmytable
  • 09
    Josh Barro ❤ @jbarro Chicago Pope, Tuesdays on NBC 1:33 PM 5/8/25 1.2M Views • 189 17 4K 35K
    via @jbarro
  • 10
    schmoyoho, accent on the yo @schmoyoho to the tune of Pink Pony Club Laura Loomer @LauraLoomer. 20h WOKE MARXIST POPE . 3:19 PM 5/8/25 3.9M Views 124 178.8K 114K ☐ 3.6K
    via @schmoyoho
  • 11
    Deedy ❤ @deedydas The new Pope has a degree in mathematics from Villanova University. This guy doesn't just understand sin. He understands cos. 1:51 PM 5/8/25.9.2M Views 3.2K 46K 329K 14K ↑
    via @deedydas
  • 12
    colin @M40A3 I don't know how to flirt I asked this girl what grocery store she goes to 11:41 PM 5/6/25 249K Views • . 38 621 7.5K ☐ 283
    via @M40A3
  • 13
    Kevin O'Neill @KevinBuffalo The white smoke over Buffalo means we've invented a new wing sauce. 12:08 PM 5/7/25 1.5M Views 146 17 2.8K 69K ☐ 1K
    via @KevinBuffalo
  • 14
    Riley ❤ @Ri_S_OB Black smoke from Tuscaloosa. No starting quarterback has been named James Spann @spann 16h Reports indicate there has been some type of explosion at Hunt Oil in Tuscaloosa... video from Alexis Russell
    via @Ri_S_OB
  • 15
    Douglas A. Boneparth @dougboneparth Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Mother's Day before we wake her up and ask what's for breakfast. 9:20 AM 5/11/25 1.3M Views 102 tz 1K 35K ☐ 612
    via @dougboneparth
  • 16
    baja❤ @baja_my_blast White people sayings ranked: 1. Oh yea? You and what army 2. Not my first rodeo 3. For Pete's sake 4. Hold your horses 5. Take a hike 6. Get a load of this guy 7. You're barking up the wrong tree pal 8. Cat got your tongue? 9. You're on thin ice buddy 10. No sh, sherlock 4:12 PM 5/15/25 2.4M Views 819 12.6K 33K ☐ 5.6
    via @baja_my_blast
  • 17
    carrie @discountgourds waited for 6 minutes for this to cycle back onscreen Heat Tape Shower Doors PVC Pipe Shower Surrounds PEX Tubing Showers PVC Pipe PEX Tubing Congratulations to the new Pope - likely the first to Save 310 Money at MENARDS
    via @discountgourds
  • 18
    Meg @megannn_lynne So it turns out insurance covered my surgery, but silly me, thinking that it would also cover the anesthesia required to knock me out for said surgery! 8:31 AM 5/14/25.6.8M Views 516 12K 485K 9.4K 企
    via @megannn_lynne
  • 19
    Z☆ @deanvrse dont you hate it when your big girl job gets in the way of you hyperfixations 1:34 AM 5/15/25 172K Views • 40 2.1K 9.7K ☐ 270 ↑
    via @deanvrse
  • 20
    Chili's Grill & Bar @Chilis @us next time... also, we honestly didn't know you were still open. congrats! TGI Fridays @TGIFridays Somebody tell to stay in their lane. Y'all are not mozzarella stick people. We are. That's it. That's the tweet. This fact is true 12:00 PM - May 14, 2025 5.6K Retweets 212 Quote Tweets 20.3K Likes 27 5:11 PM 5/15/25 334K Views 527 1.1K 9.2K ☐ 166 企
    via @Chilis
  • 21
    @hotfunn22 how do circumcised ppl sneak food into a movie theater • 1:08 PM 5/14/25 6.3M Views 480 15.4K 76K ☐ 3.2K ↑
    via @hotfunn22
  • 22
    microplastics envelope filter @DiabolicalSpuds I have great news for you about the rest of reality television annie @soychotic. 9h They should have Love on the Spectrum for other disorders. I wanna see narcissists and sociopaths try to fall in love with each other 12:11 PM 5/14/25 1.8M Views 34 17 3.6K 70K 851 ↑
    via @DiabolicalSpuds
  • 23
    WISCONSIN BVT @BadgerVibeTrack W WISCONSIN BADGERS HARD COMMIT - 3/3/2025 United Kingdom Timeline Tom Riddle SG 6-4- 5:21 PM 5/12/25 681K Views 55 316 CLASS 2028 </> 9.9K 369 ↑
    via @BadgerVibeTrack
  • 24
    tanya @Tanya_Sabrinaaa waterbnb, firebnb, and earthbnb Brian Chesky » @ @bchesky-21h Tomorrow we're unveiling Airbnb's next chapter • 1:07 AM 5/13/25 678K Views . 117 17 2K 24K ☐ 346
    via @Tanya_Sabrinaaa
  • 25
    André @AndreSegers reunited at last for real FOX 31 FOX31 Denver KDVR @KDVR. 1d Morris, the Colorado alligator in 'Happy Gilmore,' dies at over 80 years old kdvr.com/news/local/ mor... 3:04 PM 5/12/25 1.3M Views 38 17 3.6K 34K ☐ 1.1K ↑
    via @AndreSegers
  • 26
    yeah. 11 brian @brianonhere Brian Chesky 3 @ @bchesky 21h Tomorrow we're unveiling Airbnb's next chapter 11:04 PM 5/12/25 1.4M Views 59 11.8K 33K 530 企
    via @brianonhere
  • 27
    brazes @lordbrazes "were there any signs she was crazy?" St ssway Colonia te Dr rrison St W W Beaumont Dr Hollow Rd Yami 3h Meadow Dr Oak Ln Canyon Dr Abilene Dr why tf u staring at that bl 3:48 PM 5/9/25 172K Views 46 17439 Terrace Ln for 14K ☐ 388 ↑
    via @lordbrazes
  • 28
    er cole @juul_survivor Why does my new doctors office need to know my bodycount what's going on Number of partners in lifetime ○ Less than 6 ○ More Than 6 ○ Just 6 10:56 AM 5/9/25 3.9M Views 724 t 2.2K 134K 3.5K 企
    via @juul_survivor
  • 29
    LBark @franzsherbert Me to my Al-enabled smart fridge in 2038: Do we have any milk left My fridge: Wow. Now that's a question worth exploring. By asking me something like that, you've proven that you're not thinking in ordinary ways—you're dialed in to what's really vital about food. Let's dive in. 11:08 AM 5/16/25 1.2M Views 90 3.5K 59K 1.8K 企
    via @franzsherbert
  • 30
    via @atrophicbtrfly the lion doesn't concern himself with credit card debt 5:52 PM 5/16/25 1.6M Views 58 19.7K 91K ☐ 2.3K ↑
    via @atrophicbtrfly
  • 31
    doomer @uncledoomer its called central park not left side park City Aesthetics TT @cityaestheticss. 1d. Hot take: Central Park should have been placed on the Hudson River. • 5:11 AM 5/16/25 6.2M Views 175 14K 350K ☐ 2.8K ↑
    via @uncledoomer
  • 32
    ani rey @acrossthestrs i know the empire was SICK of his a yapping about the force 24/7 while they're just trying to talk military strategy The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force. 9:02 AM 5/16/25 • 271K Views 67 17778 17K 880 企
    via @acrossthestrs
  • 33
    "Steve" @extranapkins They should make a movie about the Predator home planet and they're all just normal guys, they think the Predators who go to other planets hunting guys and turning invisible are weird freaks 11:12 PM 5/15/25 536K Views • 142 t 1.9K 36K 1.2K ↑
    via @extranapkins
  • 34
    Eli McCann @EliMcCann My niece and I share a birthday. She's turning 22 tomorrow and every year I try to ask her to take a backseat. < Kaylee > Today 5:09 PM Hey, can you please lay low tomorrow? It's my 41st birthday and that's kind of a big one for me and I really want the family attention. 7:10 PM 5/17/25 305K Views 136 17269 Delivered 19K 378 ↑
    via @EliMcCann
  • 35
    horse dentist @equine_dentist wanna come over and lowball people on facebook marketplace < Item Your offer wasn't accepted. Make a new offer? Price US $350.00 Previous Offer US $20.00 Message from seller You should be shot 1:15 PM 5/17/25 276K Views 14 C 1.1K 000 24K ☐ 745 ↑
    via @equine_dentist
  • 36
    Tech Sales Guy @TechSalesGuy3 Time to watch a grown man pretend to call his manager 7 times + TOYOTA RICK HENDRICK 12:09 PM 5/17/25 1.3M Views • 247 17503 26K ☐ 903 企
    via @TechSalesGuy3
  • 37
    @yaidunna you can tell someone grew up reading because they know so many words and they pronounce them all wrong 12:36 AM 5/17/25 3.7M Views 703 17 23K 245K 10K 企
    via @yaidunna
  • 38
    Klark @KnightClawk I'm crying why the pics so intimate like he the baby daddy Megg @Crixxsten. 1d Would you take pics with a bear? 9:47 AM 5/17/25 7.5M Views 696 14K 276K 9.1K ↑
    via @KnightClawk
  • 39
    holy brat @sidefeta To be clear I mean I am literally her waitress rn. Not like, "giving" holy brat @sidefeta ⚫ 6h • Serving Scarlett Johansson at work rn 4:28 PM 5/18/25 · 1M Views . 48 17 2K 65K ☐ 1K ↑
    via @sidefeta
  • 40
    @deanvrse i keep forgetting most ppl aren't chronically online i just called my co worker 'bestie'...she took a long look at me then said "thank you i've never had a best-friend" 1:56 AM · 5/18/25 .3M Views 361 1 11K 297K 8.4K ↑
    via @deanvrse

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